Thursday, May 15, 2008
Bad mood, mal humor, ill-tempered...
I have been told that as a little girl there was a time when I was in a perpetual bad mood. I am the fourth child, and mom and dad didn't stop there. As a matter of fact, they had four more. When Shannon came along, I think I was young enough not to care so much, but when Caitilin rolled into the mix I went berzerk! I am told I said things to the effect of "I hate her!" and "I want to throw her out the window!". Man, what kind of devil child was I?! I was at the time going through a phase where I got glasses (not the cute glasses, mind you), and had my four front teeth knocked out by the forehead of a friend. Such a poor, pathetic child I was! The good news is I grew up to be a very happy girl and have much love for the baby sister mentioned. However, there are moments. We all have our moments. You know what I mean, and you've had them before too. My 'moment' began yesterday and has managed to linger into today. I wish there was logic to a bad mood. It will begin with annoyance at one thing or another, then it gradually just mounts, until it truly becomes a mountain of overwhelming emotion. When I'm in it, I can't seem to 'snap' out of it like everyone would like me to. It gradually goes away, and I when it does, I hardly remember being so hormonal and moody. I'm a stubborn type and will let it go away when I want it to, basically.
As I was thinking about this today and being annoyed with my bad mood, I remembered my nephew Ryan who I visited in North Carolina a couple of weeks ago. Dear 4 year-old Ryan was in a bad, bad mood one Sunday, whereupon he began yelling as we got into the van to go to church, "NO CHURCH!", and repeated it at least 10 times for the neighbors to hear. He reminded me of myself as a little girl and had the amazing ability to maintain the 'mad face' for quite some time. As we arrived to church, he covered his face so no one could see him or talk to him to try to cheer him up, etc. I tried to make silly faces at him so that he'd 'snap' out of it, but being as stubborn as I am, he refused.
Caitilin, the patient and loving mother she is, held him on her lap, all the while snuggling him to help him feel better. Soon after, I looked over at Ryan, who seemed to soften and change his mind about being in a bad mood. He put his hands over his face, and as if magic, he removed his hands and with a sweet smile on his face said "I'm happy now, Mom". It really happened! He continued to be happy for the remainder of church and the rest of the day!
My point is, maybe I could learn something from this four year old. Just put my hands over my face, take them away, and magically be happy again. I should rid myself of the pride and stubbornness and just be happy! It's totally ridiculous, I know. If you ever find me in the aforementioned bad mood, I do apologize, and I'll do my best to be magically happy again! Thanks.